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Business Tips Self Belief

Imposter Syndrome and How to Beat It

Picture this…

You’re acing your tasks, and nailing those deadlines, then a tiny voice in your head whispers, “You’re not good enough.”

Sound familiar?

If it does, you’re probably suffering from Imposter Syndrome, something that according to Micro Biz Mag, the magazine for micro-businesses and freelancers, 39% of the UK population suffers from on a weekly basis!

Imposter Syndrome is a serious problem suffered by professionals across sectors, and that’s why I’ve decided to create this article, explaining among other things, what Imposter Syndrome is, why we get it, and how you can beat it.

What Exactly Is Imposter Syndrome?

Imposter Syndrome is that nagging feeling of self-doubt that makes you question your ability, and all the things you’ve done, despite having evidence to the contrary in front of you.

Reasons Behind Imposter Syndrome

Psychologists believe that Imposter Syndrome is rooted in deep-seated beliefs of unworthiness and perfectionism, often as a result of childhood experiences, societal pressures, and unrealistic expectations, something I know a lot of you will totally get!


So, What Can Be Done About Imposter Syndrome?

When it comes to dealing with Imposter Syndrome, you first need to recognise the symptoms, or the telltale signs, which could be:

  • Constantly Self-Doubting

Regularly have troubling feelings of self-doubt where you question your abilities, competence, and qualifications, even though the results are obvious in what you’ve achieved.

  • Downplaying Your Achievements

Downplay your achievements as if they’re something to be ashamed of, and put them down to luck, timing, or other factors rather than acknowledging your own skill and effort.

  • Always Fearing Failure

Often feel an intense fear of failure, which will often lead to procrastination, avoidance of challenges, or reluctance to take on new opportunities, due to fear of being exposed as a fraud.

  • A Tendency To Overwork and Obsess About Being Perfect

Work more hours than you need to and say things like, “I just need it to be perfect,” as a justification, and this is usually because you think making a mistake will reveal your incompetence.

  • Looking For Constant Validation

Always look for the approval of others to validate your own worthiness and rely on the feedback they give to lessen your feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.


The Ripples Of Imposter Syndrome

Now let’s talk about the real-life consequences of Imposter Syndrome – what happens in reality.

The thing is, Imposter Syndrome isn’t just some harmless ‘mind habit’, its ripples can affect your career progression, stunt your personal growth, and cast a dark shadow over your mental wellbeing.

You might find yourself passing up exciting opportunities, such as going for that well-deserved promotion out of fear of failure, and instead, ‘play it safe’ to avoid making mistakes.

Then, when you’re stuck in a place you don’t want to be, regret can set in, especially if you see others progress in the way you wanted, leaving you with a sense of low self-esteem and low self-worth.

And there’s more…

Imposter Syndrome isn’t just out to ruin your career, it can also have devastating effects on your personal life by chipping away at your self-esteem, fuelling anxiety and stress, and even causing you to sabotage good relationships.

None of this is good, but the great news is, with a bit of work, Imposter Syndrome can DEFINITELY be beaten.


Battle Tested Tips For Beating Imposter Syndrome

I say ‘battle-tested’ because the following tried and tested tips have come from reputable psychology sites from across the internet, which I’ve put together below in a more accessible format.

But remember, these are just general tips for dealing with Imposter Syndrome, and if you are struggling to cope, please look for professional guidance to help get you back on track.

  1. Put Together Evidence of What You’ve Achieved

Create a dedicated space and time to bring together proof of what you’ve achieved. This could be collecting certificates, awards, positive feedback, or just a list you’ve jotted down of the successful projects you’ve completed or milestones you’ve reached.

Once you have all this evidence, keep it handy so you can revisit it from time to time, especially when you’re feeling the self-doubt creeping in, or when you find yourself downplaying some of those amazing things you’ve done or goals you’ve achieved.

  1. Slay Those Negative Thoughts

We all get these thoughts, such as, “I’m not good at anything,” or, “He’s much better at that than me.” But, to fight back against Imposter Syndrome, we need to stop these damaging thoughts in their tracks, and instead focus on the things we’re really good at.

A good way to do this is by converting negative thoughts into positive thoughts. So, if you do feel the need to work more hours than anyone else, recognise your strong work ethic, instead of seeing it as a way to address your ‘perceived’ failure.

  1. Avoid The All-Or-Nothing Mindset

A common reaction to Imposter Syndrome is to think in all-or-nothing terms, such as, “I have to complete this entire project or I’m a failure.” This mindset usually just sets us up to fail from the start as the goals we set are often beyond what we can achieve.

So instead, break down your goals into smaller, more achievable steps. Celebrate progress, even if it’s just small bits at a time. And, recognise that success isn’t always about huge achievements; it’s also about growth and learning.

  1. Talk To Others

As you might with many other mental health challenges, talking to others about your Imposter Syndrome and how it affects your life, is one of the most powerful ways to start beating it, and living without it constantly lurking in the background.

When you do open up, whether it’s to a trusted friend or colleague, a family member, or a mentor, you’ll likely find others have similar doubts, and by sharing your experiences of Imposter Syndrome you’ll get a better perspective and start reducing its impact.

  1. Accept That We All Fail

Another good way to deal with Imposter Syndrome is to try to understand that everyone suffers setbacks and failures in their life and that YOUR setbacks and failures don’t define who you are or your worth as a human being.

To gain this understanding, start seeing your mistakes not as failures but as lessons in how you could improve, and use past mistakes/lessons as stepping stones to achieve your goals, rather than looking back on them with shame or disappointment.

  1. Do Other Things

When you have Imposter Syndrome, it can often be more noticeable in the working environment, especially when a big project needs completing, or when deadlines back up, giving you the sense that you’re losing control.

During these periods especially, make time for other things in your life, such as hobbies and other interests, and nurture important relationships. By doing this, you’ll begin to recognise that your value extends beyond your job title or work accomplishments.


In Conclusion

Remember, you’re not alone in your struggle with Imposter Syndrome, there IS help out there, and you DO have the power to beat it with confidence, courage, and a sprinkling of self-love.

Your journey to success starts now!!


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Categories
Self Belief

Gaining Lovely New Clients

Gaining Lovely New Clients

An Unexpected Phone Call

This week, I was contacted by a lady looking for help in preparing & submitting her self assessment.

As soon as I answered & she started talking, she sounded like she was smiling. In turn I could feel myself smiling while I was speaking to her. You know, one of those people you could feel was your cup of tea. (I love a good cuppa).

I don’t think she actually realises how much of a positive impact her good vibes have on people. Having had a pretty cr*ppy week for various reason, speaking to her really put a spring in my step.

Do you know anyone like that?

A Boost

When you get the unexpected call from a complete stranger, who chooses to entrust their business affairs in your hands, is huge. Especially, for someone, like me, who isn’t always very confident about themselves, not unconfident in their ability to do the work just in general.

So this lady getting in touch, choosing me, and making me smile was exactly the lift I needed. I am now getting prepared to receive all of her paperwork, getting everything processed & submitted so she can focus on growing her business.

2 friends linked little fingers

Its not only complete strangers that can give you a confidence boost, but a friend can too. A lady named Tori has been an amazing friend to me over the last 4 years, since our children started school together. She recently spoke to me about working with me as a VA which I was over the moon about.

We can now offer a wider variety of services, we can take on a larger number of clients, not only that, but who wants to work alone all day every day? I know some people like their own company but I don’t, I drive myself insane.

Next Steps – Gaining Lovely New Clients

Now I am right at the end of my course with Pitman Training, Reading, I am chomping at the bit to start gaining lovely new clients as a VA & not just bookkeeping & accounting.

I can’t wait to finish learning, although I have enjoyed it & it has helped me move myself & my business forward but I just can’t wait to grow further.

BRING IT ON!!!!!

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Categories
Self Belief

VA Blog Self Belief

VA Blog – Self Belief

This post is all about trying gain some self belief, lets be honest, that’s something so many of us are lacking. VA Blog – Self Belief.

Peoples Perception Of You

Do people see you as confident? Bubbly & outgoing? But inside you’re completely torturing yourself? Drowning in your own negative words? “You can’t do this, give up now, people will be laughing at you they wont take you seriously etc”

Well, you’re not alone!

I was exactly the same, and to an extent, I still am. If anyone says they have never suffered with any form of anxiety

They Are Lying!!!!!

A New Book

I started reading a book by Marcus Rashford MBE, a book called “You Are A Champion: How To Be The Best You Can Be“, I quickly realised it was aimed at Teenagers, but I ploughed on anyway. I found it amazing how hard this young man has worked to get to where he is today & what a positive & determined mind he has. He talks of dreaming big & setting little goals to make the big dream come true in such a way that, event though I am not a teenager (just, ha ha) made me get that determined feeling to push myself. I would recommend it to anyone to give to a youngster ages 10/11 upwards. Very well written.

It got me thinking about my anxieties & insecurities. I realised that it is ok to have MY OWN life goals. Goals that will make me happy, doing what I wanted to do. Goals that are massive, like Marcus, his goal was to play football for England & look where he is now?

So I thought, if he can do it, so can I!!!

My Goals

So, what needs to be done first, I need to set myself some goals………

Lets try 3

(I can always set more)

Goal 1 – To finish my study course. Studying, as much as I am bettering myself, it has been really stressful. Studying, working, being mum, also being teacher with home schooling & PTA Chair to the girls amazing primary school. So I will definitely be celebrating when it is over.

Goal 2 – Get my first client as a VA. I have always been a person who enjoys helping people, so this role was kind of a no brainer. I still have a few really lovely clients for Bookkeeping/Accounting, one of which is The Jam Jar Cocktail Club. (They do some amazing cocktails, give them a try, if you haven’t already).

Goal 3 – Feel Proud of myself! I have always been my own worst critic so for me this will be the hardest challenge. I always just say “I was ok, I could have done better though”. How do you go about telling yourself you’ve done a good job? I really struggle.

What next???

Actually start believing in myself. I have worked so hard to get to where I am now, so I really need to start having a bit of Self Belief.

What about you?

Does having self belief come naturally to you? If not, how have you worked on it? I could do with some tips.

Stay safe everyone

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